About Doubt and Stuff

Hello, everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful Super Bowl weekend! I don’t care what team you were cheering for you have to admit, it was a good game! 🏈 If you didn’t watch the Super Bowl, hopefully, you still had a lovely weekend! I watched my son, Kobi, play in a football pilon tournament in LA, CA. It was fun taking a bus and being around a bunch of teenage boys. Kobi (#5) is the one in the middle with the white jacket on the bench.

Kobi-Black-Pilon-football

Today, the thought of doubt came to my head. We all have it, but what do you do with it? Here are five tips that have helped me get past doubt.

Doubt

  1. Accept it. Did you read that right? Um, yes you did. Accept doubt. As I had mentioned earlier, we all have it. Don’t ignore doubt. Listen to what it is saying to you.
  2. Understand where doubt is coming from. Take a moment to reflect where the doubt is stemming from. Fear? Lack of resources? A misunderstanding? Maybe write in a journal, meditate, or pray to gain clarity.
  3. Talk to someone. Β Talk to someone. None of us could make it through this world alone. I think people come and go in our lives for specific reasons. Have you ever doubted yourself and a teacher, parent, significant other, or friend told you how great you were at something? All of your doubt begins to dissipate because one person (or maybe more) believes in you. We are very hard on ourselves, so it isn’t always easy to believe in ourselves. Having one voice to lift you up or a shoulder to lean on can make all the difference in our confidence. Maybe you can be that voice or shoulder for someone else too.Β  πŸ™‚
  4. Step on it. Okay. Okay. I let you have your pity party long enough. It’s time to fight. Fight past that doubt. Make a plan, and if you don’t have the energy for a plan, take one step forward. All you need is one step at a time.
  5. Keep on walking. Don’t look back. Doubt may try to catch up to you, and it may even catch you. Guess what? That’s okay! Start steps 1-5 again. Just remember one thing: keep moving forward. I love this quote, “Even if you fall on your face, you’re still moving forward.”
even-if-you-fall-on-your-face-youre-still-moving-forward
Photo credit: Motivate.com

Personal Story on Doubt

Here is a quick update on Jy’s (my 8 yr old) meeting I had today at the school for his IEP. He will have a special education assistant come into the classroom and help him 30 minutes a day, and he will leave the classroom 30 minutes a day for individualized teaching. He will have extended time for homework and exams. There are several other accommodations.

When my son first got home from the hospital at the end of November 2015, I was in complete denial that anything was wrong with him. He was a perfectly “normal” “healthy” boy again. This was far from the truth. Then, doubt crept in. Will my boy ever be “normal” again? (Reminder: he was hospitalized in a coma and quadriplegic for almost two months after receiving the flu mist.)

 

  1. Accept it. I had to accept where he was at after leaving the hospital.
  2. Understand where it is coming from. I wrote my feelings out and prayed to understand my doubt and fears. Every parent wants the best for his/her child. I felt a loss for the “normal” “healthy” Jy.
  3. Talk to someone. I spoke with many friends who reminded me that Jy is healthy. He is a blessing. I get a second chance with him.
  4. Step on it. Pity Party over. I had to focus on the Jy I had now. Take the steps I needed to get him better. Get him every kind of therapy I could get my hands on (if it helped him).
  5. Keep on walking. I don’t know if all of Jy’s therapies and special education will get him back to where he was at before, but we are moving forward. It is much better than feeling sorry for what happened to him. That solves nothing.

This is just one of many stories I’ve had on doubt. I’ve doubted career choices, what schools to attend, what degrees to earn, jobs, relationships, dreams, writing to you 😜, etc! But I’m a fighter like you, and we get through it.

Your Turn, Fighter! Tell Me How You Punch Doubt in the Mouth?Β 

Doing all the talking is rude. πŸ˜€ I’m always looking to learn. What tricks do you use to overcome doubt? We are all fighters! I know it. πŸ’ͺ❀️

https://ipunablack.files.wordpress.com/2017/02/doubt_william-shakespeare.jpeg?w=748
Photo credit: Pinterest

42 thoughts on “About Doubt and Stuff

  1. I agree with your tips – accept it, embrace it, love it and then move on. I read something you wrote about the flu mist…I never took the flu shot. Don’t trust it. But then again that’s me. Haha. Great post Ipuna…we’re all survivors!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. We are survivors & fighters!
      Yes, the mist is not recommended anymore. I know people die from the flu too, so it’s hard to advocate for one versus the other. My son just had a really bad, almost deadly, reaction to the mist.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. These are really good tips, Ipuna! I recall several occasions in which doubt let me to make the wrong decision. Like trying to find the best route to a friend’s wedding. Trusting someone who did not have my best interest at heart. Sometimes doubt would prevent me from making decisions, such as when I doubted whether changing high schools would stop the bullying: by the time I was ready to switch my high school time was up.
    But we fall and learn. These tips are very useful and I’ll be sure to use them when I find myself in doubt πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Samantha,
      Yes, I think sometimes we let doubt stop us. Normally, it’s best to follow your gut or instinct. Like you mentioned, you didn’t switch high school because of doubt. We have all done things like that. We learn and try to listen to our inner feelings in the future. Thank you for your insight. And darn bullies. They missed out on a great person! ❀️​ Truthfully, they were probably bullying because they had some internal flaws that needed to be dealt with. I love to know I’m not alone with falling and getting back up!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Ipuna… lovely post, great tips, and nicely illustrated. πŸ™‚
    Tip #5 is the one I feel I particularly struggle with sometimes — but it’s a matter of practice.
    I love the “fall on your face” quote, too!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Good advice. As a writer, I face doubt every day. Your five steps come naturally and the way I punch doubt in the face is to keep writing. When I doubt I’ll finish a book or have a troublesome scene, I write until I finish or resolve the problem. These doubts can be paralyzing if you allow them to grow. Thanks for the post and good news on the teaching plan for Jy. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. John,
      Yes, I discussed Jy in my post, but I feel the exact same way with writing. I try and write 1000 words a day like you. I’ve always worked in the area of my left brain. Math and science. Straight forward. This creative stuff is hard. There is lots of room for doubt. I love Stephen King’s book On Writing. He talked about how long he doubted himself even after he had several movies out. We all live with it and have to push past it. Thank you for sharing. I’m glad I’m not alone!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I doubt that the flu vaccine is safe therefore I listen to that doubt and do not get it. So doubt can work out in your favor. And that doubt I can classify at times as my intuition. Whenever doubt does creep up I listen to it to hear it’s wisdom. Sometimes it is based on fear and if so I want to know why. When I do then I deliberately act to prove that doubt will not keep me back. Doubt is tricky and slippery. Sometimes it tells me truth to guide me and other times it is a catalyst to assist me to be brave. That is what I do with doubt. Oh that doubt that sabotages my self confidence … I talk to my friends to get a boost and smile. πŸ’–

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I just had the best conversation with our Veterinarian today who was brutally honest in saying medicine, both human and animal, is far from understanding a lot regarding the body/mind. Countless times we both have ended so frustrated doing all we know how to do yet in the end not knowing why our cats are dying. It would truly behoove you to begin questioning. When I was a nurse I swore medicine was the only way and knew best. I know today, 24 years later, that is not true. And to hear a Vet honestly voicing what I am saying makes me feel like I won the lottery. I’m only saying all this for your own benefit. I learned the hard way that medicine is still very much in the dark regarding a lot. Please don’t shrug off that your son just had a really bad reaction to the flu must. This happened for a reason, IMO, to get you to start questioning and for the scales to fall off your eyes how medicine is best. If all of us with good brains begin to search for real answers we might little by little change for the better what needs to be changed. πŸ’–πŸ’–πŸ’–

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  6. I love how you broke your post down into concrete, do-able steps and related it to your own personal challenge. I try to do the same when it comes to doubt (aka fear). Look it straight in the eye and say “I got you! Thanks for the growth opportunity.” 😠πŸ₯Š

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Nothing like facing it full on – after the pity party,which is essential. Without that, we can’t move on, we get stuck. the trick is in recognising when the time is right to move on and start being more positive and focus on taking charge. Every blessing to you and your family, especially Jy πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

        1. Growing up I didn’t have many people who motivated or inspired me. I had to really search within and look for examples outside of my immediate home. I hope I can pay it forward and inspire/motivate others with a few of my words. Thank you! You are amazing and inspire as well! Ms. MD to be!!! ❀️​

          Liked by 1 person

  8. Great post and thanks for sharing your own personal story to walk us through your steps of dealing with doubt. I love when someone can share personal experiences as it is so much more relatable than just only giving solutions without hearing what brought you to these.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I’d go further about doubt! Painful though it can be, I think we should not only accept it but value it. It is certainty that is ruining our environment and driving terrorists to kill. Doubt keeps us humble and opens us up to connecting with each other. I’ve struggled with this in some of my poems (The Road Ahead, On the Merciful Wisdom of Doubt etc) if you are interested. Thanks for your post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. “Value doubt.” I like that. “Doubt keeps us humble and opens us up to connecting with each other.” Very wise words. You are a talented poet. I read a few of your poems, including the ones you suggested. Thank you! ❀️​

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