Let’s be honest. It’s easier to be negative than it is to be positive. Curse that person with road rage. Flick the teacher off who gives you a bad grade. Blame the football coach for lack of playing time. Be pissed off that my son recently received an IEP (including special education) because his brain can’t function at the ability it once did before he received the flu mist and was hospitalized for almost two months in a coma and quadriplegic half of the time. (My eight-year-old son’s story is true and happened October through November 2015. He had Guillain-Barre Syndrome and encephalitis. We will review the IEP and special education plan next Monday.)
But how does negativity make you feel? Is it solving anything?
Being positive takes work!
Positive energy requires controlling one’s natural response to react to or situation or snap! It takes discipline and self-control. How can you get there?
Acknowledge Your Feelings First
When my son was hospitalized for two months, most of the time I felt like I had to be “strong.” We are human. Being stoic is not normal. I realized that it is okay to be sad, angry, or whatever you feel like. Allow yourself to feel those feelings first. Acknowledge that they are there.
If someone upset you, it is easy to say, “brush it off.” We have hearts, emotions, depths, and layers. “Brush if off” is easier said than done. It’s better to acknowledge your feelings. Accept them even. Just don’t do anything stupid (meaning you will regret it later).
Come Up with A Plan
When you are calm, come up with a plan. The best plan has positive results. Do you think yelling back at someone will give you positive results? Um, no. What about reacting to road rage? Crazy road rage people carry guns nowadays! So I vote, no.
With my son, my goal is to get him to his best self. I can’t control what happened to him. It happened. I’ve grieved over his “old” self, and I’m over that. What I can control are the resources he receives to give him the best future. Therefore, all of my energy is being spent on getting him the therapies he needs. Additionally, I provide him quality homework time to get him caught up. I make him do a little more homework than his peers. We play memory games or card games to help his brain react sooner. We read a little longer than is required as well. He doesn’t like this right now, but I told him that it’s not okay to just accept where he is at. He needs to fight (in a positive way) for more. He is a fighter.
How do you handle when people ar negative toward you? This can tear you down and eat at your self-esteem. We all want to be accepted, but the fact is not everyone will like us. When we allow the negative energy to consume us, we lose in the end. How can you be productive when you feel crappy about yourself? The best way to handle negative people or hate toward you is to succeed. Don’t spend time feeding into the negative energy. Use your energy to keep trying to make your life better today than it was yesterday. That’s what matters. No one will care about your happiness or success more than you (and most parents).
We are all busy and are trying to find our way in this complicated world. We also have limited time and energy to work with. Why spend any of our energy on negativity? It just sucks away at your productivity and happiness. Spend your time and energy on your happiness and becoming a better person today than you were yesterday.
Please let me know your thoughts! ❤️